Thursday, December 17, 2009

Santa Banta Jokes SMS

Santa: I tried ur number so many times, it always said ‘Switched Off’!”

Banta: Nooo, it’s my HELLO TUNE!

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Daku Mangal Singh Banta ke ghar mein ghusa aur bola: Sona kahan hai, jaldi bataao

Banta: Pura ghar khali hai malko, jithe marzi so jao!

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Santa to Jeeto: Kaisi sabzi banai hai, bilkul Gobar jaisa swad hai.

Jeeto, maatha peet te hue: Hey bhagwan! Na jane inhone kya-kya kha ke dekha hua hai.

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A crow shits on a Banta. Preeto gives tissue paper to him.

Banta: Koi phayda nahin, kauwa toh ud gaya!

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Banta: Jab main paida hua tha to military walon ne 21 topein chalayeen thi.

Santa: Kamaal hai ! Sab ka nishana chook gaya ?

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Santa meets his old friend.

Santa: A & B, A & B, A & B, A & B, A & B.

Friend: Oye, iska matlab?

Santa: Kuch nahin yaar, I mean long time no C.

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Santa: Drinking n driving dono nalo naal nai ho sakde.

Banta: Y?

Santa: Je speed breaker aa gaya taa peg dul jau.

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Phone ki ring baji. Santa: Phone mere liye ho to kehna mein ghar pe nahin hoon.

Jeeto phone pe: Wo ghar pe hain.

Santa: Maine mana kiya that…

Jeeto: Phone mere liye tha!

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Santa to a doc: Apne nurse bahut achchi rakhi hai, uska haath lagtey hi mein theek ho gaya.

Doc: Jaanta hoon, thappad ki awaaz mujhe bhi sunai di thi.

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Santa was writing the passive voice of ‘I made a mistake.’

He wrote: I was made by a mistake.

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Santa: Oh yaar main badi mushkil mein hoon. Meri biwi mujhse ek pappi ka Ek rupeya leti hai.

Banta: Oh yaar tu lucky hai, auron se to woh 5 rupye leti hai.

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Santa to Banta: Main apna purse ghar bhool aaya, mainu 1000 Rs chahide si.

Banta: Dost hi dost de kam aunda hai, le 10 Rs, riksha kar te purse le aa.

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Banta: Wo ladki deaf lagti hai. Main kuch kehta hoon, woh kuch aur hi bolti hai.

Santa: Kaise?

Banta: Maine kaha I Luv U, to woh boli ‘Maine kal hi Naye Sandal kharide hain’

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